As I usher in another year of life (I turned 29 on March 29), I’m feeling that annual push to reflect. If each year has resulted in a new earned a pearl of wisdom, I have 29 lessons to share.
To continue with tradition—I started sharing these birthday-inspired lists in 2020—here’s another compilation: a mix of advice (some borrowed from previous lists, but mostly new entries) that I hope applies beyond myself.
29 lessons from a 29 year old
1. Make a habit out of saying yes more than no. For me, the result has yielded more adventure, stories, experiences, opportunities, surprises, friends, and memories.
2. I can’t think of a more wonderful privilege than to age.
3. I can do hard things. (You can too.)
4. I deserve a little treat. (And you do too.)
5. It’s okay for me to recognize my gifts out loud. I’m allowed to take up space and be loud about my talents. I don’t have to be humble and small to appeal to others: I can promote myself, share my work, show my skin, exist exactly as I am and who I want to be.
6. “Should” is a toxic word, and it doesn’t belong in my vocabulary when talking to myself.
7. Not to get preachy, but it’s really really really important to go to the dentist. Lol. Self-care isn’t just baths and face masks, it’s going to the necessary appointments and taking care of yourself in the ways that will matter most long-term: get your teeth cleaned and checked, go to the doctor, go to therapy, get annual skin check-ups, and sign up for a workout class so that you can move with full mobility as you age. If you have the privilege of access to health benefits, use every single one, every single year.
8. Sunshine (paired with blue sky) is so incredibly important to my health and happiness. And going on an annual trip to find some amid a Wisconsin winter is non-negotiable. (Lesson learned.)
9. If you wouldn’t say something to someone else because it’s too unkind, you probably don’t deserve to hear it either. Be as gracious and compassionate to yourself as you are to others.
10. To the best of my understanding, the overall goal here (and maybe purpose?) is to live a happy and healthy life, with as much love as possible.
11. There’s nothing quite like being married to your best friend.
12. Go at your own pace, knowing that there’s no such thing as a timeline to success.
13. Jennie Finch preaches that in softball, there’s really two things you can control: your attitude and your effort. It continues to feel relevant for most situations.
14. I don’t buy into the “if he wants to, he would” mantra. A lot of times, people don’t come into relationships with all of the skills, resources, examples, or know-how to be a perfect partner.
There’s levels to this, and if someone treats you like garbage willingly and often and without regard for your feelings, I absolutely recommend leaving and never looking back.
However, I know that if I didn’t have some level of patience to communicate my needs and to show and teach what I need from a partner, (paired with his desire to grow and learn), I wouldn’t be with the love of my life today. Who, at one time, didn’t know how to show up for me in the ways I assumed were obvious.
Who has, incredibly and beautifully, grown 100 million percent into the partner I deserve and rely on and couldn’t imagine a life without.
15. Pickleball is the best and I want everyone to play (especially with me!).
16. Asking for help when you need it is not a weakness.
17. It’s never too late to find a new community. (It can be hard, but it’s worth it.)
18. Productivity isn’t a test of morality. It’s a symptom of capitalism, and years of messaging tailored to help our society function: you don’t have to be a “productive member of society” to be a good person. One does not negate the other. You are allowed to rest, to exist, to be still, without feeling bad about it.
19. Things are a lot easier if I stop judging myself for who I am, and instead embrace the quirks that make me special.
20. There’s no feeling quite like spending time with your people. Even when the moments are few and far in-between, savor the hell out of them and soak up every memory.
21. What you do and how you look are just small facts about you, and not who you are. I think we all forget that sometimes. You are so much more than how you make money, and you are so much more than the body you exist in.
22. I don’t think there’s really an excuse for “not liking” politics, and choosing to tune out what’s happening in the world. In addition to that being a crazy privilege, it’s silly: everything is political.
It’s important to be informed; at the very least, consider that many people can’t just choose to tune out police brutality or the fear of their marriage being overturned, or even have basic control over what we can do with our bodies. Don’t turn a blind eye to things that matter, just because they make you uncomfortable.
23. Being soft and sensitive isn’t a weakness.
24. “Fake it till you make it” is fantastic advice. When I tell myself that I’m a capable, intelligent, social, powerful woman who can exist outside of my comfort zone, it doesn’t take long for me to accept it as fact.
25. I’m my best self when I’m reading books consistently and writing often.
26. I grew up knowing that every single person is beautiful in their own way and has something that makes them special. This has served me so well over the years, especially in how I look at, treat, and understand myself. I wish everyone had that lesson.
27. An object at rest stays at rest. If I want to break cycles of depression, it helps to imagine myself as a force of motion. I have the power to disrupt. (And, I have!)
28. If you notice a void, try to fill it yourself. For example, I always felt like I missed out on opportunities to have dress up events and theme nights…but then I started throwing them myself. And people loved it and felt the same! Don’t be afraid to be the starter.
29. Every once in a while, it’s worth it to stop, pause, and remember: I have a good, good life. I’m happy to be here.
Established in 2018, Sunshine with Savannah is a catch-all blog with an emphasis on weekend travel, millennial-style marriage and fun, reflection-based musings, outdoor adventure, home design, and all things lifestyle.
Though the content is diverse and varied, the heart of this space stays true to a single, guiding principle: a simple pursuit to find sunshine, wherever I go.
Awakening Wonders says
Thanks for sharing your wisdom! Keeping living the good life!