27 candles

This hasn’t been the best week.

Honestly, that’s a laughable understatement. (Because, in this situation, we laugh so that we don’t cry.)

I’ve been hanging by a thread, dealing with just a few insane things:

• A fraudulent moving company that threatened to take all of our things hostage for a $1k fee per day if we didn’t comply to an incorrect balance (they claimed we never paid any money, even though we had paid around $5k)
• A storage issue with said stuff, that gave us less than 24 hours notice of arrival
• A negotiation with the seller of our new home, who will not be ready to clear out all of his stuff in time for closing
• A title company that wouldn’t respond to my requests for closing cost payment information…even though I needed it immediately for everything to go through in time for closing
• A string of unfortunate errand errors – food order location mix-ups, banks without bankers, sudden appointment cancelations, parking snafus (including paying for a free valet service) … you name it, it probably happened
• Dealing with movers on delivery day – hours late, in the snow, with soooo many red flags – by myself
• An error with our loan – finding out in the eleventh hour that we couldn’t just prepare our taxes, we actually need to file them. Then, scrambling to find our tax documents in the piles of freshly delivered items, along with a late night of doing taxes on a tight deadline
• Many sleepless nights, early appointments, trips across town, and too many damn phone calls

But here’s the good news: I made it through.

In fact, I got through the bullshit a little older and wiser; amid the crazy hostage takeover situation, I turned 27. My birthday was filled with night sweats and sheer anxiety, but it came and I lived to see the start of another year on this earth.

I’m not quite sure it started out on a great note, but I also truly believe that it can only go up from here.

In the short few days I’ve lived within my 27th year, I’ve had a few moments of appreciation. As much as I was saying “fuck my life” on repeat, I tried to sneak in a few “love my life” assurances as a means of balance, even if they were empty words. But here are a few that came to mind, regardless:

• I am incredibly capable, dependable, sharp, and strong. I will DIG my way out of a nasty situation with tact and deliberation
• I’m the manager of our household affairs and I’m really proud of the work I find time to do for us
• I’m very lucky to have an amazing husband, loving pup, supportive family, and some gemstone friends
• We bought a house?!?!?!?!?! WOOOO! Proud to be homeowners for the second time!!!!
• I’m so thankful to our realtor who went to bat for us this week, and has had our back throughout this entire process. Plus, she brought me chocolate truffles when I needed them most! (Post-move, pre-taxes.)
• I really like Milwaukee. Running around different parts of town with unhinged fervor has given me confidence in new areas, and I’m liking my discoveries
• Hotworx rocks and I’m proud of myself for putting myself out there and trying something new and hard! Go me!
• I have a very good life, filled with lots of love and good vibes and flexibility
• I can do hard things!

Hopefully, 27 is a good year, full of adventures and travel and success and happiness. I hope I laugh and dance and smile and seek out the joy and sunshine even with clouds on the skyline.

If any of my positive realizations and affirmations mean anything, I know that I don’t need to just hope – I can and, more likely than not, I will.